In this episode, we’re back in the Mahabharata. We’ll learn more about the Pandava and Kaurav children growing up. We’ll witness a superhero get a massive power upgrade when Duryodhan poisons Bhima. And we’ll learn that if your cousin offers you some sweets, it might not be a very good idea to not greedily gobble it up. Especially if your cousin offers it after you have not been very nice to them.
If you haven’t heard the previous Mahabharat stories, check the links in the show notes. But here’s a summary of the story so far.
Bhishma, the crown prince of Hastinapur, gave up his throne and promised never to have any children, so that his father could marry a local fisherman’s daughter, Satyavati, and her children could rule instead.
But fate had something else in mind. Tragedy after tragedy struck the family. Satyavati’s children themselves passed away. Satyavati, Bhishma, and Satyavati’s two daughters-in-law Ambika and Ambalika were the only surviving members of the apparently doomed dynasty. And yet Bhishma refused to marry to carry on the bloodline. And that’s when Vyas – the author of the Mahabharata jumped in and revealed that he was actually Satyavati’s son. He didn’t sit on the throne, but he helped continue the family. Three boys were born. Pandu, Dhritarashtra, and Vidhur.
Pandu had health problems all his life. Dhritarashtra was born blind. Vidhur was perfectly healthy but was ineligible because his mother was a servant girl and not a princess.
Pandu ruled as Emperor for a short while, before he accidentally killed a rishi and had to give up his throne as punishment.
His wives, Kunti and Madri had 5 sons, thanks to a little divine help. Kunti’s dark little secret was that she had had that same divine help before her marriage to Pandu. That dark little secret was a baby – Karna. To avoid society harshly judging her, she cast away the baby Karna in a basket in a river.
Dhritarashtra meanwhile had married Gandhari, a princess from Gandhar. She permanently blindfolded her eyes in an act of rebellion after finding out she had been asked to marry a blind man.
After a very difficult pregnancy, she was blessed with over a hundred children. The oldest of those was Duryodhan.
It was already a controversial issue – who deserved to sit on the throne? Yudhishthir, the eldest Pandava, because he was the oldest of the lot and his father had been emperor. Or Duryodhan because he was the oldest son of the current emperor. Technically he was younger than two of the Pandavas, but his father was the one on the throne. The choice of ruler – Duryodhan or Yudhishthir was at the heart of the entire saga.
Last time, we saw the Pandava and Kaurav children enrolled at Kripacharya, which didn’t work out very well. And so Bhishma found a new Professor – Dronacharya.
That’s where we’ll continue the story. Dronacharya won’t feature much in today’s story. Because technically this happened before Dronacharya. It was a typical lazy summer afternoon at school. The Pandava brothers were scattered about the field, doing this and that. Arjun was off practicing Archery. Yudhishthir was reading a book somewhere. Nakul and Sahadev were doing their favorite thing – which was riding horses. The Kaurav brothers were all assembled in one place. This was a major club meeting in progress. If you’ve read the Calvin and Hobbes comics and seen their G.R.O.S.S club, this was kind of similar, complete with newspaper hats. Except there were one hundred and one Kaurav brothers, not just a boy and his stuffed tiger. And this club was called G.R.O.U.P. Get rid of Uppity Pandavas.
The meeting was called to order. Kaurav brother number 43 was the secretary of GROUP and handed out the agenda printed on leaves. And today it was Kaurav brother number 37 taking down minutes.
Kaurav brother number 43 began – “Attention! All Rise. This meeting of GROUP is called to order by the Great Grandiose dictator for life, future emperor of Hastinapur, Supreme chancellor, Duryodhan the bold. now in session. Stand up and hail his humbleness. May his wisdom and strength prevail. Kaurav brother number 32 will read us back the action items from the last meeting”
Kaurav brother number 32 at this point sheepishly admitted that he had lost the minutes from the last meeting, owing to a sudden gust of wind that blew all the leaves out of his hand.
King and Tyrant for life Duryodhan glared at Kaurav brother number 32, but Vice-President for life Dushasana had a more favorable opinion. “I bet it’s Bhima’s father, Vaayu. Vaayu is the god of wind, he’s always looking to mess with us”
“Speaking of Bhima, let’s move on to our main item on the agenda” Kaurav brother number 43 continued. “It has been brought to GROUP’s attention that since the last meeting, Bhima has again violated section 5, paragraph 3 of our charter. A person who injures, assaults, demeans, mocks, insults, or irritates or threatens by gesture, words or presence, a member of GROUP will be designated as an enemy of the club, and all club members will work to avenge said injury, assault, demeaning, mocking, insult, threat or irritation in a manner chosen by the King and Tyrant or in his absence, the Vice-President”
“I must admit based on the way we worded section 5, paragraph 3, I can’t tell how severe his crimes were” Duryodhan replied
“Table a motion to break up paragraph 3 to resolve ambiguity. The secretary is directed to add this to the agenda for the next meeting”
“When do we get to sing the club anthem?” asked a low ranking, and completely bored Kaurav brother.
If there was a danger that they were about to lose the crowd, it passed quickly.
Because no less than seven Kaurav brothers stepped up to describe how they were minding their own business stealing some mangoes from a neighbor’s tree. It wasn’t like it was Bhima’s tree. He had no business being there either. But when he saw the brothers in the tree, he rested his foot on the trunk of the tree and violently shook it.
“Shook his foot? What’s the big deal with that?” asked Vice-President for Life Dushasana.
The 7 Kaurava brothers corrected him. He shook the whole tree! Just by pushing it a little with his foot. He kept doing it until we all fell out of the tree.
The club suddenly went silent. They all knew Bhima was powerful, but no one had guessed
“There’s more,” said one of the victims, almost sobbing now. “He gathered all the fruit, glanced at us lying there on the ground and remarked that it was a pity the rest of the apples were all rotten”
“I thought you said it was a mango tree” said one Kaurava brother who wasn’t quite the sharpest knife in the drawer.
“Well it was a mango tree,” said a brother sitting next to him “but he was referring to the expression…a few bad apples, a few rotten apples, well never mind, you won’t get it”
At this point, the club went silent as all eyes turned to Duryodhan.
Duryodhan was in a bit of a shock. Even he hadn’t been able to shake a tree like that. And he was the strongest of all the Kauravas.
Some of the back-benchers were advocating for immediate and direct action against this uppity Pandava. They had discussed how Bhima had pulled an otherwise inconsequential Kaurava brother by the hair last time. And the time before he had challenged all hundred and one of them simultaneously to a fight. Bhima had even volunteered to fight them blindfolded and with his hands tied behind his back.
Duryodhan needed to tread a fine line here. He could not appear weak as his club titles demanded. And he couldn’t also dare to take on the task of direct, decisive action against Bhima. It was sure to fail. And he might be the one shaking like a leaf, like his seven brothers here. No, he needed to be subtle.
And he had just the right plan in mind. That the plan involved some sweet talking diplomacy goes to show that Duryodhan was learning the art of politics necessary to be a successful ruler.
“Brothers, I have a plan that I’d rather not share just yet. But suffice it to say that if I succeed, they can cut our school food budget by half”
“So we get half the food we are used to. How is that good?” asked the dim-witted Kaurav brother.
Vice-President Dushasana was exasperated. “Supreme dictator Duryodhan is alluding to the fact that Bhima eats as much food as the rest of us combined”
“Oh, is he going to stop eating with us in the cafeteria?” asked the brother, still unsure.
“Yes,” said Dushasana. “Bhima will stop eating everywhere. Not here in the cafeteria, not back at the palace, not at Burger Raja or Taco Bhel Puri or Maharaja McDonald’s”
The brother seemed to get it this time. The meeting was adjourned soon after and everyone went back to their merry ways.
The next day at lunch, the cook had made Kheer, which is a sweet porridge that typically functions as a dessert. This was a happy coincidence. He knew that Bhima loved kheer.
Duryodhan took a clay pot with him into the kitchen before lunch. The cook needed a little persuasion, some bribes and threats before she agreed to let Duryodhan take some Kheer with him. The administrators were strict about the food budget, especially as they had had a rude shock when Bhima enrolled. The cook was worried someone might think she ate the Kheer herself. But ultimately she figured the quantity to fill one clay pot was not large enough to be missed. Besides, she could always attempt to go with Duryodhan’s story of surprising his favorite cousin with a treat. Even though it seemed like a totally fake one.
During the actual lunch, just as Duryodhan had anticipated, Bhima was disappointed that the kitchen ran out of Kheer after he had consumed only a few buckets of it. Bhima went looking for a post dinner snack near the mango trees, just as Duryodhan knew he would.
The next part was easy. The oldest Kaurav prince walked over casually with his clay pot and greeted Bhima.
“Hey there,” he said to his massive Pandav cousin
“What are you doing here? Are you looking for a fight?” asked Bhima, eagerly. Truth be told, Duryodhan was really the only one who made his wrestling matches competitive.
“No, I wouldn’t dare to. It’s not even an even contest,” replied his cousin. “I’m here to offer you some Kheer. I noticed you in the cafeteria today and saw how disappointed you looked when they said the Kheer was all gone”
“What?! You are offering me an olive branch?” was Bhima’s shocked reaction.
“No. It’s Kheer” said Duryodhan not quite understanding
“It was just an expression, never mind. But Kheer. Gee, thanks! You’re a nice guy. To be honest, I always thought you hated my guts”
Duryodhan replied “it’s nothing. Just a little friendly sibling rivalry now and then. Don’t think any worse of me”
“Say this Kheer tastes a little different” Bheem said, not out of suspicion, but just making an observation.
“Yeah, it’s because I added something special to it. I had to go back to the palace for it, but my mama Shakuni keeps lots of interesting stuff. I got nothing but the best for my favorite cousin”
He was prepared to go on but at this point, Bhima had finished the Kheer and was looking at him with woozy eyes. Within seconds he fell to the ground, eyes closed.
Duryodhan looked at him and laughed an evil maniacal laugh. His plan had worked. The secret ingredient he had grabbed from Shakuni’s closet was poison.
Dushasana, who had been observing from a distance, came over. It was only when Bhima let out a loud snore did the two suddenly realize that the poison hadn’t taken effect yet. They accelerated to the next phase of the plan. They tied up the sleeping Bhima using some ropes and tossed him into the river.
Carrying the sleeping Bhima had exhausted both the Supreme Dictator for life and Vice-President of G.R.O.U.P., but their spirits were high. Tonight, the club members would rejoice! They could use their entire club savings up, why not? They had just gotten rid of, literally and figuratively, their biggest enemy. One down, four to go.
But had they actually gotten rid of Bhima. Let’s dive deep down to the river bed and see what was going on there.
Well, Bhima was there, his arms and legs tightly tied up in special G.R.O.U.P. knots that weren’t easy to undo. If he was his usual self, he could have burst his bonds and swam quickly towards fresh air. But the poison was beginning to take effect at about this point.
He could barely burst free of his bonds. And he was running out of breath. This seemed like the end. But it wasn’t.
Just then a massive snake appeared on the scene and bit Bhima. Instantly that seemed to cure Bhima’s poisoning.
Several problems I want to point out here. First, that’s not the way venom works. Yes, it’s true that snake venom is used to make some anti-venom. But if someone you know happens to have been poisoned by a special poison from Gandhar, do not go looking for a snake to bite them. It’s very likely to turn out negatively both for them and for you. Secondly, poisons and antidotes don’t work instantly. Certainly not in the time it takes to hold your breath under water.
At this point, the snake had realized that something was wrong. The reaction he had on this boy was the opposite of normal. Instead of killing him, the snakebite seemed to have revitalized him. This seemed important to the Snake. He decided to take the boy with him to his world. Alive. This seemed too important an opportunity to pass up. Snake scientists were studying the effects of venom day and night in order to improve potency. They would love to study this boy. Quickly before Bhima could drown, the snake grabbed him and dashed off to the Naag world. It was an underwater cave which had its own air supply thanks to Naag scientists who had built an air pump and filtration system.
The Snake made it just in time. The boy coughed and gasped but he would be okay. The snake took him straight to the King. The King Vasuki applauded the Snake’s foresight and announced a finder’s fee for this quick thinking Snake. Bhima at this point would have been transferred to the lab, but a snake in the audience spoke up. He introduced himself as Aryaka. He claimed to be Bhima’s great-great-grandfather. With a sudden shock Bhima realized that it must be true. He must have Naga blood in him. How else could he understand the language of Snakes? I mean there was one other way, as Harry Potter demonstrated, but Bhima thought Aryaka’s explanation seemed more likely.
A happy family reunion later, Bhima would normally have politely declined Aryaka’s invitation to stay for a few days. But Bhima was feeling a little hungry. He would have sent his mother, Kunti, a message if he could but his focus shifted when he saw the big vessel of food being cooked at Aryaka’s home. It seemed to be some kind of soup, perhaps. He tried it a little and loved it! He loved it so much that he consumed the entire vessel.
“Hasn’t the incident with Duryodhan and the Kheer taught you anything?” his great-great-grandfather asked. No wonder humans are eating their way towards extinction. It’ll be upto us Snakes to save y’all”
“Was something wrong with this food?” asked Bhima. “It tasted delicious”
“It should. Nothing wrong with the food. It’s Naagras. On a human, it’ll give you the strength of a thousand elephants”
Well that was good news. And Bhima milked it for all it was worth by staying at Aryaka’s place for an entire 8 days. All the while, Kunti and the other Pandavas were frantically searching for him everywhere. The Kauravs were too tired to help, they said. They all seemed to be nursing headaches and stomachaches after their club’s night long party.
At the end of the 8th day, Aryaka started dropping hints about how he had to travel on a business trip soon, about how Kunti might be worried about her son, and about how they had a safe and secure way to transport him back to the surface.
Finally, it was only when Aryaka stated that no more Naagras would be prepared that Bhima finally decided it was time to head home. By then he had consumed 8 entire vessels and therefore had the strength of 8000 elephants, or 8000 EP as it was designated in those days.
Bhima emerged from the river Ganga. The first person he saw was Yudhishthir. Who immediately screamed in pain when Bhima hugged him. Bhima, stumbled back in surprise at having caused such pain. In stepping back he bumped into a tree, which casually toppled over. He was going to need some time to get used to his new strength.
But first, Bhima had a massive revenge plan. He was going to crush Duryodhan into a fine powder with his bare hands, and add them to his Kheer. He would have executed it too, except Yudhishthir stopped him.
“But why?” asked Bhima not understanding
“It’s just another unreasonable thing to set us on the path to eventual war. Just imagine how many different things could have avoided this whole succession debate if some things had happened slightly differently. Bhishma could have not made a promise. Pandu could have missed and not hit the rishi. Gandhari’s pregnancy could have been normal, Bhishma could have clarified exactly who will rule next. This is just another one of those.”
Seems like a flimsy excuse. And it was. But Bhima accepted it. Seriously, Yudhishtir was right. This was just another of those opportunities to course correct and avoid things getting worse. They just didn’t take it.
That’s all for now.
Some Notes
Previous Mahabharat Episodes are here:
Episode 59 – River of Dreams
Episode 60 – Down By The River
Episode 68 – Waiting
Episode 69 – Father and Son
Episode 70 – The Art of the Deal
Episode 83 – Mahabharata – The Groom Reveal Party
Episode 84 – Mahabharat – A Princess Scorned
Episode 91 – Mahabharat – Amba
Episode 96 – Mahabharat – Vyas Ex Machina
Episode 105 – Mahabharat – Four Weddings and a Birth
Episode 108 – Mahabharat – Oh, deer!
Episode 115 – Mahabharat – How to raise a family
Episode 127 – Mahabharat – Duryodhan poisons Bhima
Check out these other Mahabharat Episodes too, some of which are peripherally linked to the main storyline, including
Episode 27 – The Rise of Shukra
Episode 28 – His Girl Friday
Episode 31 – Death Cheater
Episode 37 – A Fishy Engagement
Episode 120 – Mahabharata – Nala and Damayanti
Next Time
In the next episode, we’ll do a story about Shivaji, the founder of the Maratha empire. It’s Shivaji Jayanti next week, so we’ll celebrate this occasion with a story about him. Specifically about a mother stuck in one of his forts, desperately trying to reunite with her child,