In this episode, we’re going to do a story of Tenali Raman. We’ll see why you should read the fine print when signing up for a bet of any kind. Especially against a weasel.
And I don’t mean a real weasel. Just the allegorical one that represents a sly and sneaky person who will deceive you.
We’ve done a few different stories of Tenali Raman before. You don’t need to have heard those as most Tenali Raman stories are standalone. In the stories we’ve covered – Episode 19 – “Surely you’re joking, Mr. Raman”, Episode 2 and 3 “Animal Hater”, I might have given the impression that Tenali Raman was a person with no empathy whatsoever towards animals, whom he treated poorly for selfish reasons. Let me correct that by saying that in reality, Tenali Raman treated everyone poorly for selfish reasons.
Our story begins with Tenali Raman on holiday.
I guess constantly torturing animals and tricking people out of bags of gold is taxing enough that Tenali did need a vacation from time to time. So he packed his bags and went off to a nearby vacation town.
It was a typical Medieval Indian vacation town. Which meant there was pretty much constantly a carnival or two in town. And by Carnival, I mean a traveling amusement show or Circus or a funfair. Not the line of Cruise ships.
And when Raman and his wife Sharda, stepped into town, what a Carnival they saw! Sharda marveled at everything she saw and giggled excitedly.
She wanted to try everything! The cotton candy, the caramel apples. She wanted to try every game and every ride here.
Raman was getting the feeling he would soon go bankrupt at that rate, and so he began to apply some serious thinking here. He was clever enough to spot all of the scams and to help Sharda avoid them. He helped her win teddy bears despite the dishonest milk bottle toss, the rigged basketball toss, and the wheel of misfortune.
Feeling proud of having saved himself a few rupees, Tenali the miser and egotist couldn’t help gloating. And when you’re in a gloating mood you tend to spread out from your original topics.
He remarked to Sharda. “Look at that Gorilla in the cage. An obvious fake. It’s a man in a gorilla costume.”
“How do you know it’s a man and not a woman?” asked Sharda.
Tenali had no answer to this, so he quickly ignored her and changed the subject. Loudly.
“And that ‘magician’ over there, he’s using a walkie talkie and his associate is feeding him all the answers. And that weight lifter pretending to lift the 400-pound weight. Pooh, he’s just a weakling.”
Of course, when he said all this, he was clearly audible to the magician, his associates, the entire backstage, the weight lifter, and indeed half of the people at the carnival.
The glares were making Sharda uncomfortable of course. She hurriedly urged her husband.
“Raman! Keep quiet! And go fetch me another caramel apple.”
“Just a minute!” thundered the weight lifter. Let’s call him Balwan.
Balwan continued “you think I’m a weakling?”
Sharda now was nudging him by the elbow, but Raman didn’t care. “Of course. I’ll say it again. You, sir, are a weakling.”
A crowd began forming around them. There was some excitement in the air. Were they going to witness a fight here? Except, on second thoughts it wouldn’t be much of a fight.
Balwan asked, “If I’m a weakling, I suppose you can tell me who a truly strong person is?”
“Of course I can,” replied Raman. “Sharda, just stop pinching me. I got this, okay! Go get your fortune read of something. And go to the 50paise weight machine, not that fake palm reader.
Now back to you ….Balwan.” he continued after pausing to read Balwan’s name tag.
“You wanted to know who a truly strong person is? You’re looking at him.”
Everyone around them looked back and forth between the incredibly muscled Balwan whose biceps had biceps of their own and the puny Tenali Raman who had nothing of importance to show other than his beer belly. Everyone burst out laughing.
5 minutes later when everyone was quiet, Balwan realized that Tenali was actually serious.
Other game operators at the Carnival had actually picked up on this enough to think Tenali would make a great mark. One of them who was a face painter patted Tenali on the back, with his hand covered in chalk. That would leave a mark that other dishonest operators could pick up on that night to squeeze some money out of this target who was obviously crazy or gullible.
“Alright, here’s a challenge then. Carry this 400-pound weight on your shoulders,” said Balwan.
“That’s too light for me,” Tenali replied. “I want something bigger.” Sharda meanwhile had quite given up on trying to convince Tenali. She was trying to keep a distance from her husband. She was embarrassed at that moment. Who would not be?
“I’ve got it,” Tenali said. I’ll carry that hill up there.
That settled him. If anyone had any doubts that Tenali was crazy, this was it.
Tenali continued, however. “I’ll carry that hill, no problem.”
“Still waiting,” said Balwan. “You’re all words and no action.”
“Oh yeah?” Tenali asked. “How long did it take you to start lifting this weight?”
“Three months” was the reply.
“Well,” Tenali said. “You have to admit the hill is at least twice as heavy as your weights. If that’’s the case I need 6 months to prepare. At the end of it, I will gladly hold up the hill on my shoulders. Wanna bet? A 1000 gold coins for the winner” he asked Balwan
“You’re on.” was the quick reply. “Not that I don’t trust you Raman, but you need to put the amount in escrow.”
A lawyer was called over, a contract was drafted and both parties agreed to honor the deal. Raman got a few more things out of it. Free boarding and lodging and food and anything else he needed to prepare. The villagers would chip in and pay for the privilege of seeing Balwan rub Raman’s face in the ground.
Now that all that was settled, Raman and Sharda moved into the Penthouse suite in the tallest building in the village which had all of 2 floors!
“A fine mess you’ve gotten us into!” Sharda complained as soon as she was alone with Tenali.
“Now what are we supposed to do?”
“Trust me. Sharda, this is a nice holiday. In just a few weeks’ time, we’ll be richer! A 1000 more gold coins! Imagine! For now, let’s just enjoy the lap of luxury.”
That did not make Sharda feel better but Tenali didn’t say anything further.
In the other camp, Balwan was confident he would win the 1000 gold coins.
After several months of this routine, finally, the big day approached.
The villagers had gone all out on this. They had posters everywhere announcing Tenali Raman was going to lift a mountain! Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill.
Balwan, the sarpanch or Village chief, and indeed the entire village and entire carnival staff was there. Tenali Raman arrived fashionably late.
“I’m ready,” he said.
“Okay, do it” shouted the crowd.
Tenali Raman calmly walked to the very center of the crowd, facing away from the hill he was supposed to carry. He knelt down, held his arms out towards the side, and announced to the crowd. “Ready when you are! Go ahead put the hill on my shoulders”
“What?” gasped Balwan, the Sarpanch, and indeed everyone present.
“I’m ready to hold the hill up, just go ahead and place it quickly. I already feel my strength beginning to fade.”
And then the villagers and the carnival folk began to realize how they had been tricked.
Tenali had only agreed to carry the hill on his shoulders. Not to lift it up in the first place.
He’d made a subtle distinction between the words lift and carry. Lifting the hill would have involved raising its position.
But carrying it merely meant supporting it’s weight so that it wouldn’t fall off of his shoulders, assuming it was already there
He’d finagled in a clause on their agreement that made it the Villagers’ and Carnival Staff’s responsibility to put the hill on his shoulders. He’d worked it in as part of the logistics clause, which was really meant to feed and shelter and entertain Raman and Sharda in preparation for his gargantuan task of carrying the hill.
Raman’s defense was indisputable. The Villagers and Carnival staff couldn’t prove that Raman would not able to carry the hill.
Raman won the bet. A thousand gold coins short, you can bet the village and the carnival were *not* happy about it.
But that’s Raman in a nutshell for you. He managed to get a very nice holiday, was fed, clothed, sheltered well for months. And got a thousand gold coins for it. It did not matter that the villagers and carnival staff had taken out a second mortgage on their homes just to raise the capital for the bet they were sure of winning.
Raman, the greedy, miserly, and sneaky person made them pay the entire amount. And kept it all for himself.
That’s all for now
Some notes
“Balwan” is a Hindi word that means “Strong”.
Rahman’s behavior might remind you of 21st-century finance moguls who offer to join you in your journey to prosperity, provided you carry their burden as well as yours.
Here are some previous Tenali Raman episodes, check them out.
Tenali is cruel to animals – Episode 2 – Animal Hater 1
And he continues to be cruel to more animals – Episode 3 – Animal Hater 2
How he got his start – Episode 19 – Surely you’re joking Mr. Raman
Raman was a learned man. He could fluently speak 8 languages. It’s a shame that he used all his talent towards torturing animals and tricking people out of their money. His one saving grace is that often he would trick rich people, but like we saw in today’s example that was not a rule.
That’s all for now.
Next Time
In the next episode, we’ll switch back to an animal story from the Panchatantra that may have inspired another very story famous story that is part of Aesop’s fables.