A New Format
The Results are in! An overwhelming number of you prefer to have a single longer episode every week with occasional bonuses rather than two shorter ones. We’ll be switching to this model in the New Year
Now Back to the Story
The scary shape-shifting monster gnashed her long sharp teeth and rushed towards where Sita was sitting. The poor defenseless Crown Princess of Ayodhya was about to be devoured by the monster who claimed to be the most powerful being on Earth.
We’ll get to the suspenseful scene between Sita and the monster soon enough. But let’s do it in the order in which it actually happened in the Ramayan.
The story so far – Ram, the Crown Prince of Ayodhya became the victim of some power play when his stepmom demanded that he give up the throne to her son Bharat and that he be banished for fourteen years. In exile in the forest, Ram is accompanied by his wife Sita and his brother Laxman who choose rags over riches.
Bharat who is completely in the dark about what his mother has been up to, returns from vacation to find his father is no more, and that he himself and not Ram is the King. He seeks out Ram, but Ram refuses to return to Ayodhya. Bharat reluctantly agrees to rule instead.
Since then, Ram, Laxman, and Sita have met and defeated a monster here, a Rakshas there. Generally, earning a reputation for crimefighting. You know fighting against baddies, helping Rishis out, that kind of thing. They decided to move from where they were staying in Chitrakoot to the Dandaka forest. Not because Ravana’s brother Khara was systemically eliminating everyone in the forest, although that did make their lives a bit harder without neighbors.
There were too many unpleasant memories including being informed of Dasharath’s demise. They packed their bags and moved to Panchavati in the Dandaka forest.
Well within minutes of their arrival, Sita was abducted by a Rakshas. But thankfully, within minutes of that Ram and Laxman had freed her.
We’ll continue the story right there. Ram, Laxman, and Sita went deeper into the forest. If you’re wondering how they knew their way – they did not have a GPS and stuff. But they did have a map that was printed on the back of a leaflet from the Dandaka Forest Visitor Center. The Rakshas had kindly offered it to them right before their battle with him.
So they decided on an unoccupied part of the forest, with promising lake views and adequate tree cover. When they saw it, they fell in love with the place.
Lakshman who had been handling the map from the Dandaka Forest Visitor Center spotted something on the map that shocked him. “Argh!!” he said “This forest is managed by Khara. See here – do you see this advertisement asking visitors to donate to the Governers fund? It’s signed “Khara”.
“Khara? The same Khara whom we wanted to avoid in Chitrakoot?” asked Sita.
“Yup, it sounds like it,” said Ram. “Well, Khara or no Khara, I love this beautiful place. We’ll stay here. If he does his job governing this forest, we’ll do our civic duty and pay our taxes.”
“Speaking of doing our duty, I’m going to go look around a bit, maybe find some wood to build a cabin with,” said Lakshman.
“I’m going to go talk to the neighbors,” said Sita, “you never know when we may need to borrow a cup of sugar or something”
Ram meanwhile went about planning the best spot for their house and planning the layout and stuff, and to build an archery range for them to practice.
Lakshman did find several trees that he could use to chop down and build a home with. Not bad, he thought. It should only take him a couple of days. And if the weather held up they’d be fine until then. As he was chopping down those trees, he also took the opportunity to paste several posters on trees – “Want to meditate but have a Rakshas problem? Call Ayodhya Brothers Pest Control Private Limited. Satisfaction guaranteed. Scan this QR code to read our customer reviews.” Ram had hesitated to put the last bit in there, seeing as most of their customer reviews were focused more on their…. appearance rat and lineage rather than their work. But Lakshman had insisted, every advertisement needed a customer review link. Without it, it would look unprofessional he had said.
Fast-forwarding a couple of days, it was a nice sunny day. Sita sat knitting a sweater for the winter months ahead, she said. Lakshman was putting the finishing touches on these, a window here, a window there, and doing all kinds of furniture assembly in hours that would have taken an ordinary human being weeks or months. Ram was idly sitting by wondering about this and that when he was approached by a lady. A very beautiful looking lady.
“Hi there,” she said to Ram “what’s a handsome guy like you doing in a place like this?”
Responding to the letter of the question, rather than its spirit, Ram summarized his life story. He did leave out the parts before his birth, about how Ravan had terrorized the whole world and how the Devs had appealed to him in his Vishnu form for an intervention. That was a good thing, you’ll soon see why.
Anyway, Ram wrapped up by saying: “but that was just a quick summary. If you want the real scoop, check out Narada Muni’s podcast sfipodcast.com, under the category Ramayan. You’ll get the full story there. He also has a lot of other things there besides, things that have yet to happen like the Mahabharat, Akbar-Birbal stories, Folk Tales, etc.”
“Thanks for the suggestion,” said the lady “I’ve added the podcast to my play queue.”
“Now you know everything about me. And I know nothing about you. How come you’re by yourself in a forest full of all kinds of Raskshas and other wild animals?” Ram asked.
The lady should have taken offense because she was a Rakshasi herself, but she did not. She was hopelessly in love!
So, Shoorpanakha decided to overlook this offense by the person whom she thought would soon be her husband. She replied, patiently. “I am Meenakshi. But I prefer to go by Shoorpanakha. I’m a princess of Lanka. If you haven’t heard of me, that’s okay. I generally keep a low profile. You may have heard of my brothers though – Khara and Dooshan? And maybe Ravana too, the King of Lanka? I’m more powerful than they are, but they won’t admit it. Now as a Rakshasi myself, I ought to be offended by your last remark, but I take a broad view on such things. You’re simply ignorant. Nothing that can’t be fixed. You just need the right company. So now, how about getting a drink together? I know just the pub, and if we leave now, we’ll make it in time for Happy Hour”
“Shoorpanakha, it’s very nice of you to offer but I can’t. I’m happily married to Sita over there and as much as I hate to disappoint you I must. But how about asking my brother Lakshman – he’s the one working on the roof over there”
Shoorpanakha looked at Lakshman and almost squealed in delight. He’s the guy from the Ayodhya Brothers Pest company posters! I have those posters all over my bedroom wall! What a lucky break. Sorry, Ram, I know you are very badly interested in me. But my heart lies with your brother.”
She rushed to Lakshman – “Hey Lakshman! Come on down, please”
This was not the attention that Lakshman had hoped to gain when he had put his photo on the advertisements, but a potential customer must never be turned away according to his business principles. He got off the roof and said “Yes ma’am. Ayodhya Brothers Pest Company always at your service, night or day. Now, who is the Rakshas who is troubling you? I’d like to introduce them to my sword here.”
This soured Shoorpanaka’s excitement, “You’re a racist. But like I was telling your brother just now. I’ll ignore that remark for now. I don’t need pest services. I’m just thinking that perhaps…. You know…. You and I…. we could grab a drink, get to know each other. Maybe I’ll even explain how your biases are vilifying Rakshasas everywhere”
“You mean, you’re basically asking me out? Like a Date?” asked Lakshman
“Basically,” said Meenakshi. “But hurry, we don’t want to miss Happy Hour”
Lakshman thought a moment and said. “You know, I’m flattered. A high princess of Lanka, sister of Ravan and sister of Khara and Dooshan, asking me out! Even though I’m just a construction worker/janitor/butler/bodyguard. You know Ram is the Crown Prince of Ayodhya. He’ll be King one day. Why don’t you ask him?”
“I did already. He rejected…. I mean I rejected him. He’s married to Sita over there already” she replied.
“Have you asked him if he’d be willing to you know, divorce Sita and hitch up with you instead?” asked Lakshman jokingly, even though he had an inkling that he might regret it later.
“I never thought of that!” said Shoorpanakha and headed back to Ram.
When Ram heard the suggestion from Shoorpanakha, he thought. “Oh clever Lakshman. I see this is your way of playing Ping-Pong. Well here it comes”. To Shoorpanakha he said, “Did you know Lakshman is actually a Prince and next in line to the throne?”
But the moment he began, Shoorpanakha had started thinking in another direction already. She slowly began transforming back into her original appearance.
“This is bias! That’s what it is. You can’t stand me because I’m a Rakshasi. Well I’ll show you know Rakshasis solve problems.”. Her appearance had changed dramatically now. Gone was the beautiful lady. Here, before them was a hideous monster with long sharp teeth and powerful arms.
“You know why they call me Shoorpankha?” she continued as she showed off her long point fingernails that seemed as sharp as knives.
“Poor you! How do you eat your food when your nails are so sharp” asked Ram “Do you end up poking yourself a lot?”
“I am a shapeshifter, I literally transformed in front of you just now. But since you brought up food. I’ll demonstrate. On the menu for my first course – minced Sita!”
Saying that Shoorpanakha rushed towards where Sita was sitting, oblivious to all this.
Sita had noticed the beautiful lady talking to Ram and Lakshman earlier. It wasn’t one of the neighbors – they were all Rishis. But this was probably a potential client for their Pest Control company. She was surprised therefore when a few minutes later she heard the sound of someone rushing her and looked up to see a hideous monster almost on her!
“Lakshman” shouted Ram to alert his brother who was a lot closer to Sita than he was.
Lakshman sprang into action. With his trusty sword, he quickly intervened. It didn’t take much. Lakshman’s preferred weapon was a bow and arrow but that does not mean he was not skilled with a sword. He tried to inflict minimum damage but ended up snipping off her nose and ears.
Sita looked at him puzzled wondering why he hadn’t cut off her sharp nails instead of her nose and ears.
Shoorpanakha decided not to continue the fight. She hurried away, promising war – promising to bring back her brothers.
Lakshman yelled after her “Bring it on. If you really are more powerful than them, they will need to do a lot better than that. Tell them to bring an army. A huge one!”
He would soon be getting his wish. That’s all for now
Some Notes
Shoorpanakha’s life is full of other interesting events. Which we’ll cover in a future episode
Other Ramayana episodes are here
That’s all for now.
Next Time
In the next episode, we’ll do a Jataka tale where we’ll learn a lot from Animal behavior