Mahabharata – Lakshagraha – {Ep.205} – Stories From India – Podcast

Today’s story from the Mahabharata is about how the Pandavas managed to get out of the frying pan, and out of the fire – when Duryodhan gave them a shiny palace, Lakshagraha, as a gift!

Welcome to “Stories From India”. This is a podcast that will take you on a journey through the rich mythology, folklore and history of the Indian subcontinent. I am Narada Muni, the celestial storyteller and the original “time lord”. With my ability to travel through space and time, I can bring you fascinating stories from the past, the present, and the future. From the epic tales of the Mahabharata and Ramayana to the folktales of the Panchatantra to stories of Akbar-Birbal and Tenali Raman, I have a story for every occasion.

The purpose of the stories is neither to pass judgment nor to indoctrinate. My goal is only to share these stories with people who may not have heard them before and to make them more entertaining for those who have.

Today’s Story

Today’s story begins shortly after the last Mahabharata episode. But if you haven’t heard it, that’s totally okay. I try to keep my episodes standalone. With that in mind, let me give you a summary of the story so far.

The Mahabharata is of the two greatest epics from India, the other being the Ramayana . It started with Bhishma, who was the crown prince of Hastinapur. Bhishma though a very capable made a promise that he would not marry or have children. He did this just so that his father could marry Satyavati, a ferry operator. He also promised that Satyavati’s unborn children would be the ones who would occupy the throne.

And that’s indeed what happened. Bhishma helped govern, but from the sidelines. Satyavati’s children, and then grandchildren faced tragedy after tragedy, leaving Satyavati and Bhishma clutching at straws trying to pick a successor. Dhritarashtra was born blind. He wouldn’t have qualified ordinarily, but he became the ruler after his younger brother Pandu gave up the throne. Dhritarashtra’s role was a largely ceremonial one. Bhishma did most of the actual administration, as he had sworn to do in support of whoever sat on the throne. The confusion arose in the following generation. Dhritarashtra had over a hundred children. And Pandu had passed away, leaving behind 5 sons and 1 widow. All those children were physically healthy, and each was fully qualified to be emperor.

The problem which faced them now was the opposite of what had happened in the previous generations. They now had too many contenders for the throne. Should Pandu’s son Yudhishtir rule because he was the oldest of the lot? Or should Dhritarashtra’s son Duryodhan rule instead. He was, after all, the eldest son of the current emperor.

Maybe they should have gone the WWE route and staged a Royal Rumble type of an event. Put everyone in the wrestling arena, and the last man standing gets to be emperor. But what do I know, maybe that only works when all the wrestlers are just paid actors.

Anyway, the Pandavas and the Kauravas grew up under the tutelage of first Kripacharya and later Dronacharya. As they grew up, each Prince found something to be passionate about. Arjun the Pandava was the expert archer. Bhima, also a Pandava, and Duryodhan were each the strongest amongst their siblings. Yudhishthir favored the spear. And Nakul and Sahadev, the other 2 pandavas were experts with horses. It’s too tedious to enumerate what the other hundred Kauravs were passionate about, so let’s skip them. They were all inconsequential anyway – always following Duryodhan’s lead. There was just one more person I should mention – that was Duryodhan’s friend – Karna. He was a secret Pandav, but no one knew that, Karna included. The only one who did was Kunti and she kept her mouth closed to avoid making the front page of every gossip magazine – because Karna had been born out of an incident that she wasn’t proud of.

We’ll continue the story at the point where the Princes had all graduated Dronacharya University and were ready to get into the action. They had even had a practical exam of sorts. In defeating Dronacharya’s enemy. It did not sit well with Dhritarashtra that the Pandavas had succeeded where the Kauravas had not.

During a council meeting, Dhritarashtra expressed how convinced he was that the Pandavas must have cheated.

Vidhur was his half brother. But he was never in the running for the throne, because his mother was a maid. Classism made it impossible for him to rule despite being fully qualified otherwise.

He was also a lot more reasonable than Dhritarashtra. Though no one ever said that out loud.

Vidhur patiently explained that it was impossible to cheat against an enemy on the battlefield. Dhritarashtra, stubborn as usual, refused to back down. “And how do you know that, Vidhur? It happened in this movie that Narada told me about the other day. It was called Braveheart and it’s about this Scottish guy who was battling the English for Independence and then they tricked him very badly.”

“If you heard it from Narada, it’s very likely never happened. That guy is always spinning a yarn,” Vidhur countered practically.

While Vidhur was accurate in that the battle hadn’t happened – I have to say in my defense it was only because it hadn’t happened yet. The Mahabharata was so much earlier than William Wallace’s story.

“You’re just trying to distract me. I want to put an end to this – I declare Duryodhan to be the next king.”

“That’s …. not wise,” Vidhur said. “The economy will crash! Emigration will hit an all time high. Our neighboring trading partners will want to renegotiate all our contracts. Our weapons contractors will charge extra for every sword they manufacture”

“Alright, zip it Vidhur” Dhritarashtra interrupted. “Uncle Bhishma, what do you think?”

“That’s none of my business. I’m just going to serve whoever sits on the throne”

The others on the council hesitated to speak frankly, as Vidhur had. Ultimately, Dhritarashtra decided to hold a vote amongst all his courtiers. Vidhur went through with it reluctantly, because it was a direct order. And reluctantly because he knew what was going to happen.

The results shocked the Emperor. There were 356 votes for Yudhishthir and 3 for Duryodhan and 1 Abstain. The abstain was obviously from Bhishma. And of the three votes for Duryodhan, one was obviously from Dhritarashtra. And of the other two – Vidhur was pretty sure it was from a couple of courtiers who could neither read nor write.

Just as Vidhur anticipated, Dhritarashtra claimed that there had been massive election fraud. It was all because of those mail-in ballots and all those fake voters. Vidhur politely reminded the Emperor that he had himself vetoed the bill that would have tightened election security.

Dhritarashtra mumbled and grumbled about how he was always treated unfairly by everyone, especially the mainstream media as he called it.

But he had to abide by his own rules of law. Yudhishthir would be named next in line. He cursed himself and decided he should never have let it come to a vote. Maybe a hunger games style tournament or a WWE-style royal rumble would have been best. Duryodhan could be secretly aided by a chair when the referee wasn’t looking.

Duryodhan was naturally furious with his father’s decision! This throne was supposed to be handed to him on a platter. Well not literally but you get the idea.

That night, the Kaurav secret club – G.R.O.U.P met to take decisive action. We’ve come across this club before, back in middle school when they attempted to get rid of Bheem. It stands for “Get rid of Uppity Pandavas”. The only difference this time was that they had a new recruit – Purochana. And Purochana had brought an idea to the club meeting. He had also brought along Samosas, which helped break the ice with some Kauravas who were reluctant to admit someone who wasn’t a brother. Duryodhan pointed out that Karna wasn’t their brother and he was in the club, so why not Purochana?

That of course meant that everyone was okay with it. If Duryodhan said something, his brothers accepted that without question. That’s why when the unspoken question in their minds was finally asked, it was Karna who asked it.

“I’m part of this club because I am the best archer in the Kingdom. I got here on merit, what does Purochana bring to the table?”

Dushasana’s hand shot up. “I know the answer to that! He’s brought Samosas, and they are delicious I must admit”

Duryodhana shook his head. What was he going to do when he was surrounded by this crowd? Maybe the court’s verdict was a result of a direct comparison between his brothers and Yudhishthir’s brothers. For better or for worse, he was stuck with this crew. Maybe quantity would make up for quality. As it was, things were starting to look up since Karna got inducted. Their average intelligence went up, their club meetings were more efficient and focused on the ultimate goal. Purochana promised to be another such inductee.

Calmly, he agreed with Dushasana. Purochana’s Samosas were indeed amazing. But there was something more remarkable about him. He was an architect! And in a past life, literally, he had been a general in Ravana’s army. But that was less important. Let’s focus on the architecture bit.

“Yes! Indeed. I have the most cunning plan. Behold my club mates, I have something else to reveal”

He brought forward something that was wrapped in a sheet. Purochan set it down on the table and removed the sheet with a flourish, and glowed with pride.

“That’s a cake shaped like a palace? You’re combining your talents I see!” someone said.

“That’s not the point! It’s a scale model of a palace I am going to construct” Purochan protested.

“But it’s also a cake. Is it carrot cake? We can see the frosting and the happy birthday writing on it, ” Dushasana said.

“Oh alright. Yes it’s a cake,” Purochana replied. “And yes – we’ll cut it and eat it – but first you have to listen to my most cunning plan!”

If you want to get attention, that’s the way to do it – to dangle a carrot. Or in this case, a carrot cake. Purochana explained that he was going to construct the palace for the Pandavas as a gift.

“Do you see? Sometimes I’m myself amazed by how evil my mind is”

Again, it was Karna who asked the unspoken and important question. “How does giving the Pandavas a palace constitute an evil plan?”

“Oh I knew I’d forgotten to mention something. All the palace material is extremely flammable. Once they are all inside, you know how accidents might happen? A carelessly lit agarbatti. Even an accidentally dropped candle.”

“I see what you’re doing Purochana,” Dushasana said. “But it won’t work. You’re still depending on chance. What if no one drops a candle?”

Duryodhan was an inch from tearing his hair out. But thankfully, Karna broke in “But Dushasana, suppose we do drop a candle on purpose? The coroner’s report can still say that the candle was accidentally dropped”

“Oh, don’t tell me. I got it!” Dushasana exclaimed. “What if we deliberately light the palace on fire? A simple torch should do it. And because Purochana is the one who’s constructing it, he can create some blind spots where no CCTV cameras or security guards will lurk too long. It’s perfect! The Pandavas will be gone – all of them at one stroke. And then Duryodhan will be King. Your plan had a reasonable foundation, Purochana. Not quite there, but stick with me, and with time and training, you’ll learn to think like me.”

Purochan shuddered at the thought, but was distracted because at that point they did cut the cake.

Things went smoothly with the palace construction after that. The Pandavas were naturally suspicious about this gift. But they could not refuse it. And they would have to spend at least a few days in the palace. On the outside, it looked perfect, beautiful even.

Yudhishthir thought that Duryodhan had actually turned the corner and was genuinely extending an olive branch towards them. How could they suspect him of doing something sinister here?

Bheem replied that Sinister was exactly the way to describe it. “Twice! Twice he attempted to take my life when we were in school, for goodness sake! He’s certainly not gotten any friendlier”

Arjun said he had to agree with Bheem – the Kauravas had only seemed to get more ruthless since they inducted Karna into their secret club. Nakul and Sahadeva just shrugged their shoulders – they didn’t really have an opinion either way.

At this point, Vidhur joined them. “Boys, I have some not-so-great news for you. I think that palace that Duryodhan is having constructed for you is a death-trap”

I told you so! Bheem shouted. 

But Yudhishthir wanted to hear the evidence, if Vidhur had any.

Vidhur said, oh it was just a hunch. He’d only noticed it by accident when reviewing Purochan’s construction budget. He had ordered 10,000 tons of Ghee. 

“Maybe he really likes making sweets? Or maybe it’s to cook and feed his workers” Yudhishthir speculated.

But Vidhur had more. There was this blueprint he had found, which showed that the palace was being made with all kinds of inflammable materials.

Yudhishthir suggested – maybe Purochan had meant material that was not flammable. It was a common mistake to make – it was counter-intuitive to think that flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.

He seemed to be really twisting himself into a pretzel to try to explain this away. But then Vidhur had his final piece of evidence – it was Purochan’s calendar that his secretary had accidentally dropped. The entry under next Thursday at 3am was the most interesting. That would be 3 days after the palace was inaugurated, meaning the Pandavas would be staying there that night. The entry said “Accidentally drop a lit candle in the South west corner”. And the entry that said
“Call the fire department” was a good 4 hours later, at 7am. There was no chance anyone in the palace would survive.
There was no more debate after that.

While Purochana put the finishing touches on the palace, the Pandavas and Vidhur also got busy. With the construction of a tunnel. The tunnel diggers, who were most trusted men – were smuggled into the palace on the pretext of being Kunti’s wardrobe organizers. That excuse made it less likely that Purochana would have looked too closely.

The inauguration of the palace went really well. Dhritarashtra made a big speech about hoping that the palace was warm and toasty – at least as warm as the feelings he had for his favorite nephew. Duryodhan added that he knew they had gotten off to a rocky start, but this palace was a symbol, a beacon, a torch – a spark that would lead to melted hearts and warm feelings all around. He also said that he wishes Yudhishtir luck as the next in line to the throne. And if and when the time came, he would personally serve Yudhishthir for the rest of his life, barring any tragedies of course.

The Pandavas and Kunti spent a couple of nights in the palace. And it was actually quite comfortable. Purochana himself had a room in the palace. In case anything went wrong in these early days, he said.

Well, things did go wrong. But only for him. Wednesday night came, and the Pandavas got the news that the Tunnel had just been completed. Perfect! Now they just had to wait for 3 am. 

In Purochan’s quarters, he was drinking. To celebrate prematurely, I guess. He had even invited in a few of his friends. There were 5 of his buddies from his gambling club. And because their mom was visiting and she was passionate about cooking, they’d brought her along too! She was a fan of Purochana and had a business idea for a cookbook that she wanted to discuss with him.

Meanwhile, Kunti was a little nervous about all this. She decided to do the thing she always did when she was in a similar situation. And that was prayer. But not the special type of prayer that had earned her her sons decades ago. No, what she was doing was to pray for the general health and safety. In this elaborate prayer room there were many Gods. While lighting the agarbatti, or incense stick, she contemplated which God or Goddess she should pray to.

But the decision got made for her pretty quickly. Oops she said when she accidentally knocked over the thali that contained the lit agarbatti. That is all it took. There were no fire extinguishers. And even if they were there, Purochan would have made them defective or something.

She screamed for her sons. It didn’t take them long to realize that the schedule had moved up. Which meant they were late. They all rushed to Kunti’s room and the wardrobe as rehearsed. Their overnight bags were all packed and some emergency snacks. 

Purochan had planned for a gap of 4 hours before calling the Fire Department. Honestly, the way the fire spread, even half an hour would not have been enough to save anyone. Purochana and his friends and their mother perished in that fire. The coincidence meant that when the forensics department got there, they sadly reported that the Pandavas and Kunti were no more.

Dhritarashtra was relieved. And so was Duryodhan. It was a shame that Purochan had also perished, but that was a small price to pay, the new crown prince figured. Karna suggested doing a dental records comparison to make sure that it was indeed the Pandavas and Kunti who had perished and not someone else, like Purochan’s friends or something. But Duryodhan dismissed those thoughts – “You’re just being unnecessarily suspicious Karna. Come, let’s figure out who gets to bring snacks to our club meeting now. And more importantly, we need a new name! It can’t any longer be about getting rid of the Pandavas when we have got rid of the Pandavas already”

Meanwhile, far away, the Pandavas had emerged from the other side of the tunnel into a forest. They were going to face a lot of challenges here, but that’s for future episodes.

That’s all for now

Some notes on the show

We have met Purochana before but in the Ramayana. That was in episode 190, when as Prahasta he was part of Ravana’s war council.

The Laakshagriha was made of Lacquer. Which is this special substance used as a shiny coating for wood or metal. There are different kinds, and the one that Purochana used was flammable. And for good measure he used ghee, bamboo, and wood.

In the original story, Vidhur discovered the plot and communicated it to Yudhishthir in a special language that both of them understood – Mleccha (malecchas). That is a word used to refer to a blanket set of languages spoken by foreigners, typically invaders, in India.

Previous Mahabharata episodes are here.

That’s all for now. 

Next Time

In the next episode, we’re doing a Tenali Raman story again! This one features the popular 16th century court jester in a tricky situation again. But this time, he isn’t up against the King, he’s just trying to protect his money from a thief!

Feedback

Thank you all for the comments on Social Media and on Spotify’s Q&A! I can’t directly reply to the questions there, but I’ll address them here on this show.

Samay and Hariprasad thank you for the feedback.

Hariprasad – I had done one episode. Episode 134. But I’ll be happy to cover more stories of my mom, as you put it.

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The music is from Purple Planet.

Thanks for listening and I’ll see you next time!